During the winter months on Vancouver Island in British Columbia, high tides often flood the island's western coast, leaving behind bones of dead sea life and other debris. But over the last 10 years, residents have found thirteen human feet washed ashore. That might ruin a leisurely walk for most people, but Mike Johns took it in stride. Johns was walking on the beach with his Rottweiler Taz when they discovered a human foot in a black running shoe.
Authorities identified eight of the previous dozen feet, and determined no foul play was involved.
Twitter users came for the story, but stayed for the puns:
Some people had trouble believing the deaths were entirely innocent:
But cooler heads prevailed:
And Stephanie got to say what we were all thinking:
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That's not how it works. That's not how any of this works.