On Thursday, March 22, President Trump announced he would replace departing National Security Advisor H.R. McMaster with John Bolton, a Bush-era ambassador to the United Nations and long-time advocate of military intervention in North Korea. Many around the world were dismayed by Bolton's appointment due to his hard-line policies, which will only be emboldened by the President's new Secretary of State, Mike Pompeo, and Deputy FBI Director, Gina Haskel.
President Trump also had his misgivings about Bolton, though they had very little to do with policy. In fact, President Trump almost passed on the new National Security Advisor because of his mustache.
Trump's distaste for Bolton's facial hair has been well documented over the years. In fact, he was considered for the role of Secretary of State in 2016, but was ultimately passed on because of his furry upper lip. Because that's the kind of thing The President really puts stock in.
Trump spent more time deriding Bolton’s mustache in the transition than focusing on why he didn’t want him as nsa. Kelly was said by multiple sources to have played role in souring Trump on Kelly - Kelly had a bigger problem with him than Trump did.— Maggie Haberman (@maggieNYT) March 22, 2018
Bolton commented that he "appreciated the grooming advice," but had no plans to shave his signature look.
Trump before: John Bolton’s mustache makes him unqualified to work for me.— OhNoSheTwitnt (@OhNoSheTwitnt) March 23, 2018
Trump now: John Bolton is qualified to work for me and his mustache isn’t a factor.
Trump soon: Bushy Face Bolton is out! His successor, a stack of bombs wearing a suit, will be GREAT for our country!
Most people share the President's fears about John Bolton, but for completely different reasons.
John Bolton's mustache declared war on his face LOL for real though he is a lunatic and this will result in the unnecessary deaths of so many innocent people— Ike Barinholtz (@ikebarinholtz) March 22, 2018
John Bolton’s mustache is going to get us all killed— Roland Scahill (@rolandscahill) March 22, 2018
Of course, Trump doesn't seem to be the only one preoccupied with the "mustache issue."
I bet like 50-75% of the Trump-Bolton Meeting tonight was about the mustache.— jeremy scahill (@jeremyscahill) March 22, 2018
Other people are fans of the stache!
Who knows how the future will shake out - whether the President and Bolton will form a healthy working relationship, whether the mustache will be an insurmountable barrier between them, or whether Bolton ultimately contributes to a more violent, dangerous world for innocent men and women everywhere. No matter what happens, at least we have the glorious mustache jokes of the present!
BREAKING: John Bolton accused of spending $31,000 on his mustache.— Michael Blackman (@MikeRBlackman) March 23, 2018
I’m serious. That may be the absolute only way to get the guy out. There are people in this country very bothered by mustaches. Trump is one of them. We should just bombard Trump with various pics of Bolton’s mustache.— jeremy scahill (@jeremyscahill) March 22, 2018